Should I settle for less than I wanted or should I somehow learn to want proper things?
Would I really be settling for less or am I just considering that what I thought was less is in fact, more than enough?
What about all the hours I have worked on dreaming?
Is all of it going to waste? I mean, I think I've got some gray hair as result of sleepless nights working on some wild stuff. At least there's some up there to remember me that the clock is ticking. Actually on me, at this time there's none, but nevertheless, I hear the ticking and I can't hide my uneasiness.
I wanted so much more than I have.
But I think I have so much more than I want.
Why wouldn't what I wanted be proper?
For this one I have the answer: Because maybe what I wanted is sheer fantasy.
Is it fantasy? I don't know... It could not be.
If I get there, if it becomes real, will it still be a fantasy? I think it still could.
Why do I think I have more than I want? Well because I know something about myself and Life's been going on since before I was born, I mean, who am I to determine that what I wanted is the ultimate measure by which life is measured.
Interestingly, I know what I want but what I wanted is always getting in the way.
It's good to consider. Just the fact that I am considering that what I thought I wanted isn't really what I want, open up another door to another planet 46.5 billion light-years away.
